Maybe Skynet has something against Pixar? (AKA an intro to Episode Six of 'The Film Show'.)

Once again, the movie billed for Film Club fails to feature majorly in the feature. This time however, it is not due to our tangents, but because of technical difficulties. Yes, Episode Six is supposed to be about Toy Story, but, thanks to the machines, the trilogy barely gets a mention in the material that remains. Consequently,  like bakers used to mix bread with sawdust to compensate for the lack of quality ingredients, it is filled out with a longer opening.

Incidentally, we only ever intended to produce introductions for Episodes One and Six to explain why we jump in without proper openings. We were then going to record a brand new edition. As it happened, Chris didn’t show, so James and I went ahead with the planned preludes before deciding that they were so much fun that we’d do a full set.

As of yet, there are no plans to produce this final show.

With James heading off to learn how to teach English, and Chris and I set for multiple projects outside of our third year workload, it is unlikely that we will manage to get together for a recording any time soon. Who knows, we might reunite in a decade or so, but, for now, we can only imagine what that seventh edition would have been like. I have. Here’s my version.

-Chris moans when I mention Daniel Radcliffe has expressed an interest in playing Marty McFly if there’s ever a reboot.

-Panel devise the most unsuitable cast for a modern remake of the film.

-I reveal the time travel device in an early draft was a fridge.

- Panel slag off Indiana Jones 4.  

-In Taglines, James gets them all because he’s a massive fan of the eighties.

-Our debate on sequels to long-dead franchises consists of despairing about Ghostbusters 3 and pondering how desperate Eddie Murphy must be if he signs on to Twins 2.

-In Box Office, Chris rejoices that Avengers is finally out. Massive geeky conversation entails, most of which is cut.

-Panel use the inclusion of Safe in the top ten as an excuse to do Jason Statham impressions.

-James spends the majority of Trailer Trash’s coverage of Men in Black III reciting the Fresh Prince theme.

-We wrap up with a list of people to thank in the style of an Oscar speech…

Yes, to conclude the show (and, potentially, the series), I was going to have the Taglines winner wrap up by reciting a list of people who contributed to the show in the style of an acceptance speech. It’s essentially a technique to make credits interesting that I nicked from Whose Line Is It Anyway. Casual plagiarism aside, as we never did produce that show, I can think of no better place to incorporate this list than here…

“Oh my god, I can’t believe this. This has been such an amazing journey. I have worked with so many amazing people and I owe this all to them. They are, in no particular order, you for listening or reading, Sonney for commissioning the show (I LOVE YOU, MAN), Chris and James for taking part, Alex and Tom for producing it (God, they do great work…), the M.M.C., Kermode and Mayo, anyone who sent in a review or comment, Bruce Willis (for just being awesome), and, of course, my mom…”

CORRECTIONS

James did not, as promised, spend the entire show trying to remember the name of Christoph Waltz’s next film.  He quickly reverted to thinking about Die Hard.

I am wrong when I suggest no one wants to sleep alone. Ebenezer Scrooge famously stayed away from company because he was a sucker for his single bed.

“We never said the spoiler” for Sixth Sense. I’m pretty sure there’s evidence we did…